What Parents Should Know About a Baby Sleep Pattern

Is there anything more precious than a sleeping baby? I think not. But that is as long as they are sleeping. Babies are notorious for being wide awake and ready to go at night time and ready to rest and sleep during the day. This would be fine if the rest of the world operated like this. But it doesn't. So what exactly does a baby sleep pattern look like?
How is a Baby's Sleep Pattern Different than an Adult's?

Yes, babies sleep a lot, especially newborns. Your new baby will sleep about 16 to 18 hours a day. Unfortunately, this is not during the typical hours of 6pm and 8am. A baby's sleep pattern is much shorter than an adult's and this is why babies continually wake. When an adult wakes from sleep they roll over and go back to sleep, this is not so easy for a baby. A baby has not yet learned how to go back to sleep. It seems odd that this is a learned behavior, but it's true. Until your new baby learns how to fall back to sleep, he or she will rely on you to help them get back to sleep.

A baby sleep pattern also has double the amount of light sleep cycles than an adult's. For the sleep deprived adult desperately trying everything to lull their precious bundle to sleep, this can be excruciating. Because of the many light sleep cycles, babies wake up very easily. You've rocked, cuddled and finally little Jr. nods off. You slip off to the nursery and just as Jr. touches the mattress he wakes up! Back to the rocking chair! Understanding this aspect of a baby sleep pattern will at least help you keep your patience, if not anything else.

How Can I Help my Baby Sleep Better?

Naturally, as a newborn matures, so will the baby's sleep pattern. Ideally, by the time baby reaches 7-12 weeks, a regular sleep pattern will have been established. And hopefully, this will be between the hours of 10 pm - 7 am. New parents can hang onto the hope that by the time baby is 6 months old, your baby's sleep pattern will include up to 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

If baby is fussy, make sure that the diaper is clean, that he or she is well fed and just the right temperature. Since crying is the only means of communication, a fussy baby could have one of many things wrong. A comfortable baby is more likely to fall asleep. If his or her face is red or if the hair is damp, baby is too warm. No one is comfortable when he or she is too warm and this includes babies. Just remove a blanket or turn down the heat and watch as your baby's sleep pattern comes naturally.

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Bringing up children alone

Bringing up children alone can be a lonely business, especially if you suddenly find yourself a single parent through separation or bereavement. But it’s perfectly possible to end up in a more positive place once the dust has settled.

As a single mum, taking complete responsibility can be a big challenge, from finding enough money and juggling work and childcare to coping with emotional upheaval and the need to keep going for everyone’s sakes.

A mum's view

It can also be hard to work out where the new boundaries lie. Sarah, who has two sons aged 10 and 8, stayed on in the family home when her former partner Neil left.

“I became quite soft with the boys because I was so worried that they would resent me if I laid down the law. I also wasn’t used to being the one to dole out the discipline and I wanted them to be happy. Needless to say, they ran rings around me. I was also quite stressed having to shoulder the whole burden of running the house and paying the bills. I soon realised that it was never going to work trying being their big mate and letting them rule the roost. It’s been a year now and they have settled down a lot. Well, we all have.”

Tips to cope as a single mum

It can be frightening to think that you are in sole charge of financial planning, or that you can’t just throw in the towel when it’s hard going, especially if the children are arguing or you are shattered. But there are ways to cope.

• Take care of yourself. Being the sole adult in the family can be tiring, and if you don’t look after yourself it will be much harder to look after the kids. A couple of hours childcare goes a long way - try to set aside some time for yourself, eat properly and get as much sleep as you can.
• If you find yourself counting the pennies, there are a few things you can do to stay in control. Take a look at our Money matters section for full details on what financial help you might be entitled to, plus, see our ‘Money tips for single parents.’
• Have fun with your children. It really helps to have a support network of other parents, some of whom may well be in the same situation as you.
• Don’t hide away. Getting out and about is the only way to have a social life, and it can make you depressed to stay in the house all day.
• Take a helping hand when it’s offered – support from family and friends is so important and could help you get back on track more quickly.

The Rewards

Once you become used to being a sole parent, you might find there are some upsides to the new situation.

• Taking responsibility means taking control and doing what is best for yourself and the children. It means you can set your own rules and work out what suits you best in the new set-up. And you can take command of the TV remote.
• You may find strengths you didn’t know you had, which will both help you face a different future, and lead you onto new, and more positive paths.
• It’s natural to worry about how the children will react, but they may surprise you with their resilience and will quickly become used to it being just you at home. 
• You may develop an even closer bond with the kids, particularly if you have a different view to your ex on what parenting means and you can finally express it.
• If the household has been living in a tense atmosphere, it may well become an altogether more fun place to live.

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Say Cheese!

This food gives everyone something to smile about
Madeleine Greey

My kids want to chow down on cheese 24/7. Whether it’s the first gooey thing they tuck into for breakfast or the last little piquant bite before bed, Krystal and Nick can’t imagine life without cheddar, marble and Parmesan. Truth be told, we all gravitate toward cheese as an easy, instant comfort food of choice. Besides, it’s healthy — isn’t it?

You bet. According to the Dairy Farmers of Canada, a single 2 oz (56 g) serving of cheddar cheese boasts as much protein as two large eggs. Cheese also has niacin, riboflavin, vitamin A and zinc, and strikes up the same big bang of calcium as eight medium sardines with bones.

The good news!

In fact, cheese is a top source of bone-building calcium. Just one serving of cheddar supplies 200 mg, or about 20 percent of a child’s daily need. While all cheese has calcium, levels vary widely. There’s a dramatic difference between a tablespoon of grated Parmesan (355 mg calcium) and the same amount of regular cream cheese (12 mg calcium). Here’s how some kid favourites stack up when comparing calcium levels per ounce (28 g) of cheese:

• Romano 302 mg
• Swiss 224 mg
• Mozzarella, part skim 222 mg
• Monterey Jack 211 mg
• Feta 140 mg
• Ricotta 58 mg
• Cottage cheese, creamed 17 mg
• Cheestring, Black Diamond Marbelicious (21 g) 150 mg

The Dream Dozen Christmas Toys 2010

The Dream Dozen which is chosen each year by the Toy Retailers Association, is always one of the last Christmas toy lists to be announced - and from this point of view it's never the most exciting because it contains pretty much the same toys as everyone else's lists. However the list always gets plenty of well-deserved press attention - and for many children the Dream Dozen signals that Christmas is just around the corner!

So here it is... click on the listed names for prices!

1. Jet Pack Buzz Lightyear
2. VTechKidizoom VideoCam
3. Fireman Sam Deluxe Fire Station
4. Moon Dough Big Barn
5. Zhu Zhu pets Grooming Salon
6. Paper Jamz Guitar
7. Nerf N-Strike Stampede ECS
8. Fur Real Friends Gogo Walking Pup
9. Pumpaloons
10. Monopoly Revolution
11. City Airport Lego
12. Sylvanian Families Motorcycle and Sidecar

Bonfire night - fun without the fright

Bonfire night and its firework extravaganza needn't be dangerous for small children. Follow our guide to keeping your own celebrations safe and fun.

• What you need to consider
• Ways to celebrate
• Mummy, who was Guy Fawkes?
• Safety first
• Best fireworks
• Fun food

Remember, remember the 5th of November - trouble is, with a small child on the scene, you'd probably rather forget. It might be tempting to give it all a miss, turn the kids in early and pray that the bangs won't wake them up, but think again... because while the annual firework festival may be scary, it doesn't have to be. What's more, babies and small children really can get an enjoyable and stimulating evening out of it - so it is worth a bit of effort.

What you need to consider
As with everything to do with babies and toddlers, you must plan ahead if Bonfire Night is to be a success. Here's what you'll need to think about well in advance:

• Noise: A small baby or a timid older child may not relish a noisy firework display, putting a thick, cosy hat on little heads is a must.
• Cold: If you're planning to be out outdoors for a while on a nippy autumn evening, you'll have to make sure your baby keeps warm - the best option is probably a forward-facing babysling. Toddlers will need several layers (fleeces are good), especially on little feet which get very cold in wellies.
• Walking: You often need to park some distance from a public firework event, as these are always popular, so if you've got a toddler remember you may need to take a buggy or - even better - a backpack carrier.
• Fear of the dark: Some small children don't react well to being outside in the dark - remember it's an unusual experience for them and you may need to be ready to retreat home quickly if it all goes pear-shaped.

Ways to celebrate
Bearing the above in mind, go through the different options you have for how to celebrate Bonfire Night. Here are some of the possibilities you might have open to you:

• Home fireworks display: This can be a great way to do it if you've got a big enough garden and a conservatory, or glass-ended kitchen through which to watch the fireworks.
• Shared display with friends: This can be a winner if you all share the buying of the fireworks and the preparing of the food/buying of drinks. Good if someone has a house with a garden that's perfect for fireworks and doesn't mind hosting the event.
• Public fireworks display: The fireworks are going to be a lot bigger and better than you'd get at a home display, and you'll be standing well away from any dangers. If it isn't a roaring success, you can retreat home without spoiling the evening for anyone else. But you might have to drive a long way to get there - and if you've got toddlers who like to walk, it might be a nightmare keeping track of them in a dark, crowded park.

Mummy, who was Guy Fawkes?
Hmm, difficult one. How do you encapsulate the fallout from the Reformation so that it makes sense to a two-year-old? Try this: Guy Fawkes was a man who lived a long time ago, even before grandma and grandpa were born. He didn't like the king, so he decided to try to blow him up! But someone found out what he was going to do and stopped him in time. People were pleased the king hadn't been hurt so they celebrated by having a bonfire and putting a model of Guy Fawkes on top.

Safety first
The Royal Society for the Prevention of Accidents (ROSPA) claims that in 1999 over a thousand people were injured by fireworks - a reminder that you need to do more than follow the fireworks code with tiny children. Standing outside with small children isn't a good idea unless you've got a seriously large garden. If you do go outdoors, you need to make sure someone's holding onto the children the whole time you're in the garden.

Letting children handle sparklers may be tempting, but don't do it. In 1998, 16 per cent of firework injuries were caused by sparklers. A small child can be seriously burned from a sparkler. According to ROSPA, sparklers should not be given to any child under five years because the impact of the heat is the equivalent to a welding torch. It's also important to place sparklers in a bucket of cold water when they are finished, to avoid little hands touching them after the event.

Best fireworks
With small children you need to concentrate on low-level visuals - go for Roman candles and fountains. Sparklers are great ( in adult hands, of course) and the odd rocket or two goes down a treat, although little ones probably won't be able to follow their ascent with any accuracy. Catherine wheels work well - although they do involve a bit of preparation to nail them to a suitable post. Depending on your children's ages and characters, bangers are probably too noisy. You may be best off buying the fireworks that you think will work singly rather than getting a big mixed box, because a lot of these possibly won't be suitable for your audience.

Fun food
Baked potatoes are traditional on bonfire night, and they're great for children and adults alike. Try filling them with a bacon and cheese mix when they're almost done and then finish them off in the oven so you can serve them easily. Bits of bacon rolled around cheese are a huge hit with toddlers - make sure they're well cooled, though. Garlic bread and sausages are other winners. If you're going to a public display in a cold park, you can't beat a flask of soup to warm you up - invest in a child-proof, glass-free flask to reduce the risk of accidents. For something sweet, slices of apple and grapes are easy to eat while watching the fun - or flapjacks or gingerbread men are a seasonal hit.

Can I help prevent my baby from getting colds?

Breastfeeding is one of the best ways to protect your baby's health. It passes your antibodies, chemicals in your blood that fight infections, to your baby. This isn't a foolproof way to protect your baby's health, but breastfed babies are better at fending off colds and other infections (CKS 2007, NHS 2009c).

You can also protect your baby by trying to keep him away from anyone with a cough or a cold. Or ask them to wash their hands thoroughly before handling your baby or his things (DH 2009).

If you or your partner smokes, give it up, and don’t take your baby to areas where people are smoking. Babies who live with smokers have more colds, and their colds last longer than babies who aren't exposed to smoke (CKS 2007, DH 2009).

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Pregnancy and Birth - The Things Men Worry About

It's not just women who need help with the labour; men need help during labour as well but are often left out for obvious reasons.

Some of men's most common worries about pregnancy are below...... 

• Fears about increased responsibility
• Worried that they won't know how to help their partner even though they want to help.
• Feeling left out of the pregnancy
• Surprised at how ill their partner may be feeling, and not knowing what they can do about it
• Worried about money
• Feeling unable to relate to the baby yet
• Concerned that their partner has been feeling tired or sick for a long time
• Worried about how their lives as a couple will change once baby has arrived

 Not surprisingly, men often have their own worries about the labour and birth too: 

• Not knowing if they will be able to cope at the birth
• Really concerned about having to see their partner in pain and being unable to do much
• Worries that it may all become too medical and gory
• Fears that they may be ignored by medical staff
• Anxious that they may miss the birth because they might get to the hospital too late

Men also enjoy many aspects of the pregnancy and birth. They like knowing that they can actually father a child. They love watching their partner’s body growing and feel very excited when they see baby on the scan. Just like mums-to-be, they also like telling everyone that they're expecting a baby and they enjoy planning and thinking about the baby even if it's not on quite the same scale as their pregnant partner.

 

When it comes to the birth, there are positives for men too. They also feel immense relief that it’s all happening at last after 9 very long months. They look forward to seeing the baby and knowing he or she is okay and then telling everyone about the baby, and finally, becoming a family.

 

Before the birth, the mother may feel concern for the health of her unborn baby but for men there is a constant, often unspoken anxiety about the risks to not one, but two other people for whom they care deeply and this is something we all need to remember.

 

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